Shame

shame

When I was growing up, I often felt shame. My mother was mentally ill and there was nothing you at all talking about. I carefully avoided anything that could reveal my mother's illness. It was an upbringing in shame and denial. I also felt a great debt. It felt somehow as if everything was my fault and that it was my responsibility to set things right.

In school, it could whispers of alcoholism. "Stina moved away from home. She could not stand their parents. Her father drank. "I remember that I felt envious of people who Stina. It had been so easy to just say that your parents drank. But no. Mental illness in itself was talk never about. Yes, of course. I actually had a classmate in high school, Frederick was his name. He told me that his parents were divorced because his mother was mentally ill. Only now in high school, he had been told that he not only had a sister, but two other siblings that no one had told me about. Frederick's father had not been able to take care of four children, but the two youngest, he had left off and never told any of Fredrik and his older sister. I felt terribly sorry for Frederick and also felt an affinity. It was not the only one in the entire universe who had a mentally ill parent.

My mother's mental illness made it among others in the fact that she could not clean up, but instead gathered and accumulated. She was not able to throw anything. When other friends took their buddies so I went alone. I could never bring home someone and I had nobody to talk to. When I was maybe twelve years old then expressed my mother very hard and clear to me that if I divulged a single word about how it looked in our home so I would be utkört. I remember the fear I felt. Where would I go? I had nowhere to take my refuge and I had no one at all to talk to.

My siblings were much older than me and them, I could not talk to. Everything was somehow under the lid. In stealth, I tried to clean up as much as I could. One summer I emptied my nephew and my parents' basement in secret. It was basically just rubbish we sorted out and threw the container. Unfortunately, it did not take long, it was just as much junk in the basement again.

When I moved away from home to 19 years old, it was such an incredible relief that I could finally stay somewhere where I could keep in order. I enjoyed being able to win friends and I made a decision to not feel guilty that I was no longer at home and cleaned my parents. Eventually I realized that I actually could do nothing. I freed myself from a lot of the responsibility that I put on myself to be responsible for my parents' lives.

There is an expression in Sweden that I really hate, and it is the expression; "It's a sin and a shame." It is so incredibly easy to confuse these two concepts. Taste these words himself: SHAME - SHAME.

When I became a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as I learned about sin. What is a shame really? According to our theology is a pity that of their own free will choose to disobey God's commandments or not to act righteously despite knowing the truth. James 4: 17 says:

 

He who thus knoweth to do good and doeth it not, he sins.

 

Sin is thus only about one thing; not following the will of God / the good that we know what is right or wrong. Sin is not about what other people do, it's not about making mistakes, though it was not intentional and it is definitely not about shame.

In our church, we have a wonderful theological doctrine that shields us from shame. Unlike all other Christian churches we believe is not for the original sin. Original Sin means that someone else has done wrong and we others can carry the sin and shame. How unfair is not it.

When I read the literature I'll take some of the thoughts of the förkättade original sin as completely poison the people's self-perception. You can find it in Baudelaire The Fleurs du malas well as Hawthorne's The Scarlet Letter. We are born as sinners, we inherit the sins of others ... How false is this doctrine! The truth is that we are born quite new and clean without sin and we do not inherit the sins of others.

Most recently I read Jean Paul Sartre's play The flies that just about guilt and freedom of action. Sartre was one of the 1900's greatest existentialists and he stressed that we as humans were free. We are, if condemned to freedom. It means that we do not inherit someone's sin, and it also means that we must take personal responsibility for our decisions. Unfortunately, it seems that Sartre considers that the fact that people can take their fate in their own hands also means that people can feel the anxiety and guilt.

To have the gospel in their lives and really discover what the gospel means has for me meant that I can understand what sin is and I can distinguish between sin and guilt. I know I am innocent of my parents' behavior and I vices nor them for their way of life. Mental illness is in itself no sin.

The gospel has really meant a lot in my life and one of the things is that I have because of the gospel has come to realize that I can not take responsibility for other people's decisions and way of life, but is responsible for my own decisions and the way we live and I do not need to feel guilty, but can let God take care of my negative feelings. All I have to do is start afresh and learn to listen to the Holy Spirit's promptings.

Of course, all this is a process. When I was 28 years and met my current husband, I felt a great shame to tell him about my parents, how my mother was and how it looked in my childhood home. It is only in his forties that I have come so far in my development that I no longer feel shame, but can distinguish between my life and my parents' lives and tell you about my upbringing.

Faith is not free.

our

Some time ago a Facebook friend contacted me. Hen had been a member for a few months, perhaps up to a year and was at the time of baptism very enthusiastic about taking the step and finally get baptized.

This message on Facebook, however, was anything but enthusiastic. Hen told me that the hen is no longer believed in the church. There was so much information on the Internet indicating that the Church was not true. Hen also felt uncomfortable as a member when the hen throughout its membership, both violated the law of chastity and the Word of Wisdom. When we become members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as graduates, we also promise not to have extramarital sex or make use of alcohol, tobacco, coffee or black / green tea.

Sure, it was sad that the hen had no more faith and had decided to leave the church. At the same time, I felt that hen never given any real chance throne. To be baptized into the Church is to take a step, just as it is a step to marriage. Anyone of us know that it does not automatically mean that a marriage will be happy just because you're married, you have to work on their relationship, too.

It is the same with being a member of the church. We can not delude ourselves that it is enough to join the Church and so everything flows on as well. No, it's not. A marriage is a relationship that must be built on. The same goes for the relationship we are with Jesus Christ and our Heavenly Father when we go down into the waters of baptism. We need to work on our relationship. Faith is not free. We must not confuse the concept of faith with the concept of grace. Grace comes from God and is free. If we accept Jesus Christ as our personal Savior in our lives we have been reconciled to God when Christ takes upon himself all our sins. In baptism, so we washed clean and can turn the page. We are starting a brand new life.

In this new life, it means our repentance that we keep our eyes on Christ and follow Him. IN John 14: 23 it says:

Jesus answered, "If anyone loves me, he will keep my word. And my Father will love him, and we will come to him and make Our home with him.

How to choose to believe in Jesus Christ also means that we follow his commandments. Then we can get the Holy Spirit's confirmation of our lives. Faith is nothing permanent. It is an act and an attitude. We can almost compare the faith with a plant that needs nourishment to survive. Faith needs to scripture study and prayer. Faith needs that we follow the commandments. Faith needs an affirmation of listening to the still small voice within us. Faith needs a heart that is willing to repent, humble themselves, have a positive attitude and a desire to serve. We must open our hearts and actively live out our faith.

Of course I was sad about the message I received on Facebook, but at the same time, I was not surprised. I myself have been the same; believed that faith was free and lived high on the förälskelses intoxication that I found myself in the new member. But finally, I came down to earth. The love was over and it was time to end that I realized I had to start working on the relationship that I entered with Jesus Christ and our Heavenly Father. Then, when I live right and follow the commandments which I know I have to follow that faith comes as a confirmation. I met with the miracle to feel the Holy Spirit's presence in my life that confirms to me that the path I chose when I chose to follow Jesus Christ is the way that leads to the light, joy, peace and a sense of purpose.

Swedish Society of Genetic Genealogy

dna

Here about a week I got an email from Maren belonging to my congregation. She told me about a recent website for those interested in genealogy DNA. Swedish Society of Genetic Genealogy (SSGG) has gathered the top names in Sweden for genealogy. Hit you as an individual turn if you want to know more about how to interpret your DNA results. In addition to this website, there is also, of course facebook group DNA ancestry.

"Sophie was caught by a sect"

Sect Home Kombo-241

Just when I was beginning to think that the media in Sweden might have started to become less restricted and more international in its mindset as it happens suddenly to an article appears in Aftonbladet that are clean return to the Middle Ages.

In an article in Aftonbladet with the title "Sofi was caught by a sect" (2015-03-06) describes how distraught parents who lost her daughter to a Mormon sect. Another interview with a renegade Mormon included. Unlike the story of "Sofi" so is this woman's name is not fingrerat.

The story of "Sofi" is a story that many members know. Indeed, there is not so many members in Sweden that you do not know who it is written on, especially not in this case. On Mormon Lady, we wrote about "Sofi" for a couple of years ago. The story is tragic. It is not really about a girl who chooses to become a Mormon. It is about parents who can not accept her daughter's life choices. Self I recognize all too well. My parents forbade me to have the church do when they understood my interest in it. I was forced to choose between the church and my parents. I was in fear of those who would represent my security and trust. How difficult it must be for parents to accept their children's choices and how difficult it must be for Aftonbladet not to be so black and white - all to create sensation? The sad for Aftonbladet is that there are lots of people in this country who actually know Mormons and who know that what they write is not true. "Sofi" himself wrote a blog post here on Mormon Lady for a couple of years ago where she gave her version of what had really happened. To avoid further conflicts with his parents as we were asked, however, to remove the blog post.

It is surprising that Aftonbladet may still be in this kind of duck pond and not realize that they have made fools of themselves. Other Swedish newspapers wrote today respectful of our faith. If you read a popular magazine, Huffington Post, you find many articles about the "Mormons." Some are not so flattering, but many are quite positive. They give words a nuanced picture of our church and our faith. How can Aftonbladet be as medieval? It is a mystery indeed.

Church Public Affairs felt that this article was going on and will respond to the criticism. Mormon Lady has been in contact with FINYAR researching new religions and alternative spirituality. They are surprised Aftonbladet's actions, but says Aftonbladet is difficult to communicate with. Aftonbladet had not contacted them that the article was about. Mormon Lady was the one who had to tell "Sofi" man if they stood them in Aftonbladet. The question is what kind of journalism it represents; not to allow all parties to be heard and not even informed that they intend to write about them?

On a couple of facebook groups for Swedish Church members who I'm in so discussed Aftonbladet article. How do you react when members of the Church of the article? Yes, some taking up the fact that only 16% of the Swedish population have confidence in Aftonbladet, according to a recent survey. Others feel a sense of security that people in general and, for example, employers think it is ok that they are "Mormons." Some get upset and think that Aftonbladet represents a limited socialist vision. We can all think differently. For my part, gives the closest to a post-traumatic stress disorder. I myself have gone through like Sofi has had to go through. But even though it is our parents who torment us so no one asks about our emotions and how we have been treated.

My oldest daughter is no longer active in the Church. Certainly, I hope that she ever come back to church because it is such a huge joy and comfort to have Jesus Christ in his life. But whatever she chooses for life so I respect that it is her life. She has free will and the right to choose their own life. As members of the Church, we must respect our children to choose their own lives and their own outlook on life. For me it is also obvious that all parents, regardless of creed, respecting their children's choice.

To read the article in its entirety so is this: http://web.comhem.se/dannereuter/aftonbladet_sondag_1mar_s32-38.pdf

 

 

SeminarieTV 25: & Doctrine connected 124-124

Lulea seminary class films, presenting and editing this week's episode.

 

hub

Starring: Elisabeth Dahlqvist, Moa Wirtala, Joseph Wirtala, Isaac Naslund; using Stockholmare: Saga Stahlberg, Frida Stahlberg, Beatrice Halldén. Message by David Newell, Branch president in Lulea.

NOTE: This section 25, 24 not as the beginning shows.

The Doctrine and Covenants 124

https://vimeo.com/121551385

[Vimeo 121551385 w = h = 500 281]

Saved by grace - not by works